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Author Topic: unlimited jokes  (Read 3927 times)

manjit

  • Guest
unlimited jokes
« on: March 05, 2015, 12:11:50 PM »
Hi

manjit

  • Guest
Re: unlimited jokes
« Reply #1 on: March 05, 2015, 12:12:30 PM »
Ladki ko Teddy Bear Gift Karne
Par....
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English Girl :- Oh ! So Cute .......
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Muslim Girl :- Allah ! Kitna
Khoob surat Hai ....
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Sikh Girl :- Oh Ji , Kinna sona
Teddy Hai ..........
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Haryanvi Girl :- Re Yo Ke De
Diya Bhaalu Sa .....
« Last Edit: March 05, 2015, 12:25:57 PM by manjit »

manjit

  • Guest
Re: unlimited jokes
« Reply #2 on: March 05, 2015, 12:18:04 PM »
Height of prank call😜

📞😕Hello pooja hai...?

😒Nahi...

😆😆To karvalo... Jai Mata Di !!!!
😄😄😄
Height of irritating someone:"

Boy:" pen hai ??
Girl:" nahi..

Thodi der baad..
Boy:" pen hai ??
Girl:" nahi bola na..
Boy:" pen hai pen ??
Girl:" nahi hai kaminey, aur abki bar pucha to
to hathode se sar phod dungi
Kuch der baad...
Boy:" hathoda hai kya..???
Girl:" nahi..
Boy:" accha.. to phir pen hai pen..???..
😜😜
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

A guy calls an unknown number..
Guy: Fridge hai?
Reply: Haan hai.
Guy: Chalta hai?
Reply: Haan chalta hai..
Guy: Toh pakad ke rakhna, warna bhaag jaayega..
And he hangs up.. After a while, he calls up again..
Guy: Fridge hai?
This time the person's really angry.
Reply: Nahi hai.
Guy: Kahaan se hoga.. Bola tha na pakad ke rakhna varna bhaag jaayega..😜😳

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

✔☝Ek aur...

Heart melting love story:

Boy: I can't marry u.
My family is totally against it.
Girl: Who r they 2 stop u?








Boy: My wife & 2 kids.   
😝😜😁

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

✔☝Ek aur...

Dr:Kaise aana hua?

Patient: Doctorsaab tabiyat theek nahi hain

Dr: Sharab peete ho?

Patient: Peeta to hoon, par chhota peg hi banana. I'm not feeling well !😝

.................................

✔ Bas☝last..

Teacher-How many planets are there?
Santa -Mercury, Venus, Jupiter vagerah. Vagerah
W
Teacher-Aur batao?
Santa-Aur bas ...sab badhiya!!! Ekdum

Mata raani ki kripa....
Aap sunao...??


😜😄 💐💐
One more Height of prank call.

📞😕Hello Popatlal hai?
Nahi.... Hang up


After some time again
📞😕Hello Popatlal hai?
😒Bola na nahi hai.... Hang up



And again
📞😕Hello Popatlal hai?
😒Nahi hai mere baap.... Hang up
 


And one more time
📞😕Hello Popatlal hai?
😒haan hai bol, kya chahiye



😆chal hat,.....
jhut mat bol, .. .....
Popat green hota hai.. .....
Lal nahi........

😂😂😂😂😂😂
😜 😂 😀 😊 😃 😜 😀
🏄 jaldi send karo bilkul naya hai

manjit

  • Guest
Re: unlimited jokes
« Reply #3 on: March 05, 2015, 12:23:39 PM »
Happy holi,

happy holi..

Happiiiii hoooolliiii...

hoOOliiii...

Thaaaaa!

Happy da scooter khambe vich ja vajya..

Mai te pehle hi keya si, Happy, scooter holi chala 😝😜😁😄😄

Offline Sukhdeep S. Dhaliwal Kuwait

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Re: unlimited jokes
« Reply #4 on: March 05, 2015, 04:43:30 PM »
 (lool) (lool)

manjit

  • Guest
Re: unlimited jokes
« Reply #5 on: March 06, 2015, 12:34:42 AM »
In a Nursery School Canteen, there's a basket of apples with a notice written over it:

'Do not take more than one, God is watching'

On d other counter there's a box of chocolates,
A small child went & wrote on it.
"Take as many as U want, God is busy watching d apples".
NEVER ACT SMART WITH today's generation..!!.😀

KID :- Why some of ur hair are white dad ?

DAD : – Every time you make me unhappy , one of my hair turns white …..

KID :- Now understand why grandpa’s hairs are all white …..

Moral :- Don’t be over smart ..

*************************
Child : Mummy why Gandhi has no hair on his head?
 .
 .
Mummy : Because he speak only truth.
 .
 .
Child: Now I understud why ladies have long hair....  (haha1)

manjit

  • Guest
Re: unlimited jokes
« Reply #6 on: March 06, 2015, 11:37:41 PM »
Tution sir:" abey gadhe, homework kyun nahi kiya..
.
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New age student:" tameez se baatkar saale,
customer se koi aise baat karta hai kya ??😜😜😜

manjit

  • Guest
Re: unlimited jokes
« Reply #7 on: March 07, 2015, 10:26:00 PM »
Jatt scooter te,scooter 80 te,
Jatt bullet te,bullet 100 te
Jatt alto je,alto 110 te
Jatt jeep te,jeep 120 te
Fir???
Fir  ki???
Jatt ambulance te, ambulance 130 te

Rehnda jatt speedan te e a

manjit

  • Guest
Re: unlimited jokes
« Reply #8 on: March 12, 2015, 04:40:30 PM »
Mountain Dew peene se udd
 jaata
 hai
 fear,
 .
 Basically ur concepts r not clear.
 Wah...wah
 .
 . . .
 Dost ne pucha exam me "5th
 ans.
 Batao",
 .
 Maine kaha Melody khao khud
 jaan jao.
 .
 . . .
 Ek aur arz hai,
 Pam ke pyar me pagal ho gaya
 peter,
 .
 Ab Hero Honda Spelndor 80KM
 prati leter.
 .
 . . .
 Bas..1 aur
 Atma chhod gayi jism purana,
 .
 Didi tera Devar Deewana.
 .
 . . .
 1 last bas 1,
 Blood donate karne ke pehle
 hamesha
 group janchna,
 .
 Basanti inn kutto ke samne mat
 nachna.
 .
 . . .
 Yeh lo aur ek,
 Yasomati maiyya se bole
 nandlala,
 .
 Tata Sky laga dala toh life
 jhingalala. .
 .
 . . .
 Yeh wala last pakka
 Agar tabiyat kharaab hai to
 dhundo koi
 chemist,
 .
 My name is Khan and I'm not a
 terrorist. .
 .
 . . .
 Ek aur plzz
 Dil pagal hai pyar me tere
 paaro,
 .
 ACP bola,"Fredricksk ghar ka
 kona-
 kona
 chaan maaro. .
 .
 . . .
 Ek aur arz hai,
 Maine piya aapka khoon,
 .
 Gud Afternoon Gud Afternoon.
 . .
 . . .
 One more
 Shaam ka suraj dhal chuka hai,
 .
 Oh my god,sir yeh toh mar
 chuka
 hai.
 .
 . . .
 C.I.D's One
 Fredricks ke sir par 50000 ka
 loan
 hai,
 .
 Abhijeet pata karo yeh CID waali
 shaayari banata kaun hai.
 .
 . . .
 One more yaaro
 Pappu ki item paidaish gawaar
 hai,
 .
 Sab par dish sawaar hai, dish
 sawaar
 hai,dish sawaar hai.
 .
 . . .
 1 aur ho jaaye
 Apne gammo ko dil me daba lo,
 .
 Naya GODREJ POWDER HAIR
 COLOUR,Bas
 kaato gholo aur lagalo.
 .
 . . .
 Really last one
 Mithaai banata hai Halwaai,
 .
 CENTER FRUIT...kaisi jeebh lapp
 lapppaaaaiii..

manjit

  • Guest
Re: unlimited jokes
« Reply #9 on: March 12, 2015, 04:42:46 PM »
Ek punjabi lady dusri lady se.....Inka heart ka Operation karvana hai.....Escort Hospital kaisa hai ???

2nd Lady: Bekaar hai ji. Unki Canteen me Chole - Bhature hi nahi milte
😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁 😊😎

Offline Sukhdeep S. Dhaliwal Kuwait

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Re: unlimited jokes
« Reply #10 on: March 12, 2015, 08:01:46 PM »
ਹੈਪੀ ਹੋਲੀ
ਹੈਪੀ ਹੋਲੀ
ਹੈਪੀ ਹੋਲੀ
ਹੈਪੀ ਹੋਲੀ
 

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.

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.

ਧੂਮ ਧੂਮ ਧੜਾ..ਅਾ.....ਆ.....ਕ..........
ਹੈਪੀ ਦਾ ਸਕੂਟਰ ਖੰਬੇ ਦੇ ਨਾਲ ਟਕਰਾ ਗਿਆ......
ਮੈਂ ਤਾ ਪਹਿਲਾਂ ਹੀ ਕਹਿੰਦਾ ਪਿਆ ਸੀ....
ਹੈਪੀ ਹੋਲੀ ਚਲਾ ਹੈਪੀ ਹੋਲੀ ਚਲਾ.....

manjit

  • Guest
Re: unlimited jokes
« Reply #11 on: March 22, 2015, 10:18:56 AM »
Only Punjabis can understand this..
Mama : Tennu ainni maar kyon payi?
Bhanja : Kal baraat vich bolli galat pegi c.







Mama : Kiddan?
Bhanja : "BAARI BARSI KHATAN GAYA C KHAT KE LEANDI TAAR , BHANGRA TA SAJDA, JE NACHE KURI DA YAAR....!

Mama : Fir ta maar paini hi c.
Bhanja : Mainu ta sirf maar hi payi, JEHRA 😎NACHIYA c audda parso BHOG hai...

manjit

  • Guest
Re: unlimited jokes
« Reply #12 on: March 23, 2015, 12:57:59 AM »
Boy: jan, Tumhara Naam apny haath pe likhu ya Dil pe?
Girl: idhar udhar Q likhty ho.. Agr sacha Piyar karty ho to apni property k Papers pe likh do...
('_') Oye teri,
/ yaar larkiyan
!! kitni chalk hogyi hain star plus dekh dekh k.,'

manjit

  • Guest
Re: unlimited jokes
« Reply #13 on: March 28, 2015, 07:41:21 AM »
😜
In the class the teacher said: "the first person to answer my question will go home early".

Immediately Santa threw his bag outside.

Teacher asked: "Whose bag is that???"

Santa answered: "It's mine...ok..bye bye!"  😅😂😅😂😅😂
Santa is getting smarter day by day...

manjit

  • Guest
Re: unlimited jokes
« Reply #14 on: March 28, 2015, 07:49:48 AM »
Good noon..

Breaking news

ICC has disqualified Australia for ball tampering in yesterday's world cup semifinal match. Bowlers starc and Johnson have been named the culprits. Videos show clearly they tampered it in between the overs.

So this makes India automatically qualify to the finals against New Zealand. We still have a chance to win the cup.

Thanks to Arnab Goswami and times no channel for submitting the video to ICC.

Now we can cheer back saying we won't give it back.
👯👯👯




















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April fool in advance.